The dark side of social media.

In the never-ending pursuit of likes, shares, and followers on social media, people can often forget to think about their mental health. The nature of social media is such that people are constantly comparing themselves to others and trying to please them. It's easy to forget that there's a person behind each post and not just a digital facade. But as more and more people fall prey to this addiction, I would argue, social media is evil. Many people can pop on and off various social media platforms in reality without an issue.

Sometimes it may still be fun as a convenient way to connect with people around the world. And yet, it is a huge source of frustration and anxiety for my patients and clients who can't come away from their social media connections, or who are caught up in negativity, and general low mood around social media. The interaction between humans and electronics is addictive. It describes the varieties of "highs' ' that social media addicts get from their constant "fix" of Facebook, TikTok, or Instagram.

The power of Likes

"Likes" are the eye, reinforcement, and security that addicts seek, and that they feel compelled to stay in reality with all their virtual friends. As their accounts are active, their moods shift, and social media seems to supply how to flee the ups and downs of existence. Sadly, this unusual sort of connection has debilitating effects like dissociation, anxiety, and depression, because of the neurological imbalance it creates in our minds and therefore our bodies.

There’s even evidence that social media addicts experience the identical reasonably “feel good” effect other addicts get as a result of the increased intensity of dopamine transmitters that elevate mood...until they don’t. When the addict withdraws from the reward-inducing behavior, there may be an actual chemical withdrawal within the addict’s brain.

Negativity on social media

Unfortunately, as we have all begun to experience social media is a double-edged sword and may not always be the socially connecting utopia the tech companies would love us to believe it is.

Social media has become a dangerous place for journalists, bloggers, and ordinary people who just want to share their opinions. It goes way beyond an occasional rib towards a celebrity, which is all it is these days. These days you are advised by social media managers to delete anything which could be considered offensive, racist, or otherwise scandalous.

That's harsh but true - and if you don't like how people use your Facebook page then you need to get out of there fast before it's too late.

People are ready to strike out at each other without much threat of physical recourse when communicating online generally, and on social media particularly. additionally, some people seem to think that their opinion, judgment, or admonition goes together with poorly lit photos of what they made for dinner.

Arguments online escalate quickly. An opposing view is forcefully posted without acknowledging one person's opinion. The slightest difference in policymaking can bring friends who are friends for years to their knees. Many people end up arguing about something as harmless fashion, parenting, and even recipes! This can very often lead to breakdowns in friendships and relationships both inside and outside the immediate circle of trust. People may find themselves unfriended, blocked, or trolled simply because they have a different point of view, different values, or beliefs.

Social media is a brilliant tool for keeping in touch with friends and family. It allows us to share photos and videos of our adventures, and lets us connect with people we don't know in real life. But social media is also a waste of time and can lead to real damage, such as spreading negativity and fake news and encouraging poor behaviour.

So what can we do to maintain a healthy perspective of our social media activity?

The first step is limiting the amount of screen time. Four hours a day is easy enough to achieve, even for those who regularly spend much longer online. The second step is to fix small daily quotas for specific sites. In practice, this means spending time on Facebook no more than once a day.

But here’s the problem. Most people think of themselves as being in control of their behaviour. But this isn't true. If you spend too much time on Facebook, it's at least partly because you're not aware of the fact that you're deciding to spend too much time on Facebook. The time you spend on Facebook is itself determined by prior decisions. That's what your subconscious mind does. Unfortunately, we have a deep-rooted desire to be liked and accepted by others. It’s a strong impulse that can be triggered subconsciously or on purpose. When we feel good about ourselves, we tend to think more positively about ourselves and the world around us. On social media, there are various triggers that will make you feel good.

Giving in to that impulse won't solve the problem. Fighting a constant battle won't help. If you want to win, you need to change your behaviour. The solution is to vanquish the impulse, not fight it. To solve a problem, you must do the opposite of what is usually done with the problem. How do people normally solve problems? By analyzing it and thinking about it, or by fighting against it with willpower. So to defeat an addiction, you must recognize that you have the impulse, that it is an addiction, then begin to pull back from it. This will initially be difficult, but after some time you will see your life improving. A lot of the time, our emotions and feelings control us: we feel like we cannot resist doing something. We call this impulse and giving in to impulse is called indulging. However, you can train yourself to stop giving in to your impulses by learning to become consciously aware of the cues for your behaviours. In other words, notice consciously what you are about to do before you do it.

How hypnosis and hypnotherapy can make the unconscious conscious.

This is where hypnosis comes into play. Hypnosis is excellent at making the unconscious conscious so it can be changed, re-wired, unlearned. Essentially the social media impulse was created unconsciously to help the tech companies grab our attention and increase their revenues through the attention that tweet, that like or that red notification bubble steals in that moment. With our attention held captive then they can sell to us, influence us and manipulate us. Told you it was controversial :)

Once in a state of hypnosis, a person can then learn to communicate directly with the operating system and effectively remove the unconscious trigger and at that point that the need to constantly look at the phone or to react to every notification just disappears and a person can start looking for better more positive behaviours to devote their time to which has nothing to do with online activity.

This isn’t a myth, it is a fact and I use it in my practice for all manner of unwanted or unnecessary unconscious behaviours every day.

Want to find out more about how this fascinating psychology can help you? Watch the video and then if you’re still interested, follow the link for more details of how to get in touch and how to schedule your free one-to-one phone consultation.

About the author

David Faratian is the principal hypnotherapist at The Cumbria Hypnosis Mindfulness Clinic. He founded Cumbria Hypnosis in 2006 and since then it has consistently been one of the highest-rated and reputable hypnotherapy clinics across Cumbria, South Lakes, and The Northwest. David specializes in a full range of psychological issues and has a dedicated site devoted to each issue. Visit www.cumbria-hypnosis.com